Zelig's Demon

His left-hand rests reassuringly upon my shoulder while the right sweeps toward the monitor, "This," he says with an innocent smile, his eyes dancing, "Is quite funny!" And laughing all the more innocently, his voice rising to a hearty bellow, "BESIDES, FUCK EM IF THEY CAN'T TAKE A JOKE!" his finger poised over the send button, he slaps me on the back, "Good work son!"

"Right," I say, "Fuck em! It'll be funny to read the responses!" I tap the send key. GONE. I reread what I have written, slowly digesting my mocking words, my smile fades as my stomach suddenly turns. My demon hovers over my shoulder, and looking smug. "What," I ask, "If they don't get it? What," I think again, "If someone is insulted?"

"Feeling exposed?" My Demon asks? "Well," Checking to see if my mail was sent, "Too late," He says with delight, "You know what they say about those who live in glass houses", a short, cold little laugh, and continues, all irony, "You'll just have to ride this one out!" Bending down, my demon whispers, "And besides", moving closer still, as I fearfully meet those mocking eyes, looking deep within, drawing me under, the darkness closes and my mind is filled with his voice. "FUCK YOU IF YOU CAN'T TAKE A JOKE!"

...And I can still hear him laughing.

1998